It feels like people are judging you. They’re not.
I find myself in some church environments feeling judged and like a fraud. It mostly happens in churches that feel and sound like the ones I went to in my pre-Presbyterian early 20’s. It’s been over 15 years since I identified with the theological posture of churches where male pronouns for God predominate the singing and preaching and where the Bible is engaged more literally than imaginatively. I’ve had my mind changed on a lot of those elements.
Yet those kinds of churches shaped me in important ways. And whenever I have occasion to be in one again, I feel mostly at home. Except this feeling that the people around me, who are raising their hands and closing their eyes as we sing the latest Hillsong chorus, are judging me as a deficient Christian who has lapsed into Liberalism.
But they’re not. How could they be? They’re worshiping.
If it feels like they’re judging you, it might just be you. They’re probably doing bigger things.