Monday Morning Quarterback

Note: Monday Morning Quarterback is a weekly post reviewing Sunday, the busiest, most stressful, most gratifying day in the week of a pastor/parent/spouse/citizen.

Song of The Day:

http://rd.io/x/QEq_K0F2RJk/

 

5:43. Awakened by flocks of screeching parrots. It’s autumn in Pomona.

5:57. Awakened by, “Ow! You’re on my hair!” Daughter has wedged herself into our bed. Reset alarm from 6:00 to 7:00

6:47. Awakened by anxiety.

7:32. Looking at my Bullet Journal for the first time in three days. Making to do’s for tomorrow. Today? Sunday asks no to do’s; only begs reaction.

7:44. Deliver coffee to wife, still in bed, watching replay of SNL with daughter.

8:11. Picking up coffee traveler for Family Focus group, run into mom of junior high student. Remember how much I love living in a place where I just run into people like this.

8:46. En route to hang signs and set up iPad in sanctuary, stop to help a Sunday School teacher with a paper jam in the copier (by “help” I mean stand by with my hands on my hips and mumbling, “Hmm” before moving on).

9:49. Listening to a mother of four describing her family’s sojourn from Korea to Texas to Ohio to California. Marvel.

10:06. Heading to sanctuary to make final preparations before annual 10:30 World Communion service with our partner Hispanic and Indonesian congregations. Stopped by new family with baby. Decide to walk them to the nursery.

10:11. Heading to sanctuary again. Stopped by woman with four small children I’ve never seen before. Two of these kids are toddlers, running circles around the courtyard and causing their mother incalculable anxiety. Decide to walk them to the nursery.

10:13. Introduce new mom to nursery staff with lots of reassurances about children’s programs.

10:22. Acolytes are ready. Now stealing two shiny new hymnals from the front pew for colleague and I to sing from.

10:32. Multi-lingual welcome underway. New mom’s kids are squirrely.

10:36. High school student is making an announcement about our charity walk in a couple weeks. She’s killing it. She’s great.

10:41. During the Call to Worship, new mom stands from her pew and scampers down the center aisle out the back door with two of her kids. The third stays behind a moment, then bolts after them. Die a little from the certainty that we won’t see them again.

11:22. Daughter executing her debut liturgical dance with the help of two magic women. Watching in wonder and pride and just the slightest bit of self conscious guilt over my pride.

11:36. Enjoying taking communion with wife in the front pew, since the other churches’ pastors are serving with my colleague. I could get used to this.

11:47. On the patio after worship, lots of people telling me they were watching my expression during Daughter’s liturgical dance and not the dance itself. Note to self: show. no. emotion.

12:09. With Head of Staff and Youth Choir Director, performing the annual ritual wringing-of-the-hands over the lack of youth interest in choir.

12:47. I am the grocery shopper, shopping for groceries. Anything bearing the descriptor, “Pumpkin” is in my cart. There is, however, no actual pumpkin.

1:51. Groceries put away. Bok Choy and Tempeh on for lunch. Wife napping. Daughter suing to watch “Oliver!” Ask her to wait. Whines. Assure her that it’s worth the waiting for/if she lives til 84. She’s not amused.

2:11. Watching “Oliver!” with Daughter.

2:44. Daughter absent mindedly tickling her fingers on my beard stubble. It’s putting me to sleep.

4:10. College-aged Junior high youth group volunteer calls. “Um, it’s almost 4:30 and there’s nobody here yet.” Dude, relax. Love the enthusiasm. But relax.

4:27. Arrive at youth group without my outline and not having prepared the telling of the Good Shepherd and World Communion Godly Play story I’d planned. Check the Godly Play room to find the sheep from the story missing. Five wooden sheep, gone. Change plan.

5:12. Jr. high kids OUT OF CONTROL during my mini talk on communion. Intern takes two of them outside for a tongue lashing. This is a first.

5:28. Showing students a clip from Top Chef to set up their activity: design a one-night restaurant, complete with name, decor, menu, and guest list. It’s Restaurant Wars for youth group!

5:42. My Restaurant Wars group puts the finishing touches on their idea: a restaurant called “+ Bacon” (pronounced with a French accent, Plus Bacon) that serves classic dishes with bacon added. Oh, and the plates are made of woven bacon. Also, the cream puffs are topped with bacon florets.

5:59. Turn Jr. high students loose on the snacks. Cheese puffs flying everywhere. And there’s a kid drinking directly out of the lemonade container.

6:08. Shoveling spicy cheese curls into my mouth.

7:09. High school student arrives with maple cookies, spiced cider, and candy corn for youth group. This is trouble.

7:22. Candy corn sickness setting in.

7:47. Playing The Game of Things with high schoolers, get text from wife: “Joleesa [our hamster of three years] is dying.” Gulp.

7:52. Texts about the hamster still coming. Let the high schoolers in on it, so as to not seem rude checking my phone every 60 seconds.

7:53. The first dead hamster joke appears.

7:54. We’ve moved on to “hamster cancer” jokes.

8:37. Intern leading a really nice bread-and-juice discussion of communion. Students engaged. I live for this.

9:02. Youth group over. Call home and learn that the hamster’s death bed is . . . my bed.

9:23. Return home to find wife in bed with hamster, breathing intermittently, wrapped in a dish towel on her chest. Wife is crying.

9:53. After watching Joleesa struggle for 30 minutes, go downstairs to clean her cage, planning to place her in it for the night.

9:59. Time of Death: 9:59. R.I.P. Joleesa The Hamster.

10:01. Wife informs me of her plan to bury Joleesa in the garden tomorrow.

10:30. Wife goes to sleep and I take the deceased hamster to the garage in her cage. Then turn on the replay of today’s Broncos/Cowboys game.

12:02. Through with game. Begin Monday Morning Quarterback.

12:39. Monday Morning Quarterback . . . done.